Sunday, February 14, 2010

Oh bloggy blog blog!

Dear blogger.. it's been 4 months since my last post. Not that there has been a lack of instances to blog about, but real life got in the way. As it tends to do.

But I'm back. With lots of stories to tell and patrons to rag on, WOOO!

But I think the most important thing that has happened in the past 4 months is that I have been accepted into graduate school. This means I am officially on my way to becoming a librarian. It's very exciting and I'm very much looking forward to starting my studies, I just have to finish my coursework at the undergrad level and graduate in May and I'll be all set to start in the Fall :)

Since today is Valentine's Day I think I'll regale you with a story that has a romantic theme to it. The other night my lovely ASL and I were counting down the minutes until closing. Our announcment system goes on at 15 minutes to closing and I was helping out over at the checkout desk when it went off. I didn't notice the woman that my ASL was helping but when I went back over to the reference desk I noticed ASL had made herself scarce and the woman, let's call her Janet*, was looking at books in the 616 area. I was shutting off the reference computers and compiling some stats for the day when she came over to ask a question.

Janet: in a very soft voice "Excuse me, where are the relationship books?

Teenage Librarian: Well, they are right in the area that you were looking at.. did you not find what you needed?

Janet: Well no. I'm looking for something... more personal. More about women...

Teenage Librarian: Um. Okay.. well... here are books like "Sex for Women" and "Getting in Touch With your Feminine Side" are these not what your looking for?

Janet: No.. I'm looking for books on, what's the term that they use nowadays? Masturbation? Masturbating?

PAUSE!!! Now let me explain. I'm pretty good at my job. And I'm pretty good at dealing with patrons who ask weird questions and I'm VERY GOOD at keeping my cool and not laughing and all of that stuff. I've been asked a lot of weird questions.. but never for books on masturbation.. I would think that most people wouldn't need books on that.. but hey? whatever..

Teenage Librarian: Well.. let me go look in the computer and see if we can find you anything.. (See how nice I am? I really am good with the patrons).

Janet: I'm so surprised you don't have anything here in this section. I would think that a lot of people would need books like these.. I'm newly single and by myself and I'm wanting to learn how satisfy myself.. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH (at this point I'm furiously typing and focusing on my computer thinking TMI TMI TMITMITMITMITMITMIT!!!)

Teenage Librarian: I'm not seeing anything in particular just on that subject, we have the books that you were looking at that I'm sure will mention IT but nothing just on that subject.

Janet: Well do you think that Neighboring Library might have some?

Teenage Librarian: Let me check. Why yes. I think they do! They are going to be closed tomorrow due to the holiday, but why don't you go over there and look at there selection.

Janet: What are the titles?

Teenage Librarian: UHH Well you know they are going to be at the same call numbers I've already given you.. and there are quite a few titles. I'm sure you'll be able to find some, and if you can't you can ask the reference librarians there.

Janet: OOOOOOOOOH okay.. well thank you so much. It's just been so hard being alone...

Teenage Librarian: ARGGG TMI TMI TMI... actual response: there anything else I can help you find tonight?

Janet: No..thank you..

I gave ASL the stink eye at the end of the night for running away from Janet and leaving me to deal with her. But we did have fun making up titles of Masturbation books on the way out that night.. "The Power of One" "Me, myself and I"... fun times. :)

* Janet is a reference to Rocky Horror Picture Show. The character Janet sings this song called "Touch-A, Touch-A, Touch Me" which is about.. well touching! I thought it was appropriate.

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